I’m Beginning to Think God _ _ _ _ _ Me!!!

My love life this year has been SHIT!!!.  A bad bad bad break-up in March basically followed with 2 bad blind dates from JHate.com and then an on again off again Gchat relationship for nearly 6 months that left me confused, pissed off and horny (6 months and we never went out on one date!).  I’m so sad and love-less that I don’t even have a face to masturbate to anymore.  That’s when you know you’ve hit rock bottom in the love department.

But then November 28^th happened…

After another hectic day at work, Stella and I decided to grab a drink at our local bar.  One dirty martini down and I noticed this super hot tall dark handsome man standing next to us.

I was trying to get the bartenders attention for another round and this hottie helped me.  I thanked him, and we began chatting.

The whole time we’re talking I’m thinking, Holy fuck he’s hot!  Holy fuck he’s young (26)! Holy fuck is he interested in me???  Holy fuck I’d love to kiss this man but he’s way too young and hot for me!!!

We found out that he normally works on a cruise ship but that he would be staying in NY for 2 years working on a project for the cruise line.  He was super sweet, ordered us drinks, asked us lots of questions…a really really sweet guy.

4 hours later Stella decided to head out…apparently she sensed a love connection that I was too clueless to notice.  We left the bar a few minutes later and as we were walking to his building….he kissed me!  We made out on the sidewalk for awhile…it was fantastic!!!

He didn’t want me to leave, I didn’t want to go…but I did because I’m an ASSHOLE.

He texted me while I was in the cab and told me to text him when I got home.  He even texted Stella and told her that he put me in a cab!  Come on!!!!  So SWEET!!! And did I mention HOT!!!!  He’s a fucking HOT Turkish Man!!!!

He called me the next day and asked to see me.  And AGAIN I was an asshole and asked if we could hang out the next day (Friday).  I’m not just an asshole, I’m a FUCKING asshole.  I bet you are all screaming at your screen right now saying “What the fuck is wrong with you?!?!?!?”

It was 8pm and instead of just getting dressed and seeing him, I was thinking about how I’d be tired at work the next day and how much better the date would be on a Friday night.

So Friday was the big date!!!!  I texted him around 2pm to confirm and he texted back that his company called him back to Miami…that day….and that he was already at the airport.  He was needed back on the cruise ship…ASAP!  He didn’t know if/when he would be back in NY.  😦

I was crushed.  I actually cried in my office for a good 10 minutes, feeling so sorry for myself, hating my life, believing that God hates me and REGRETTING the fact that I didn’t see him the night before!!!!

If you learn anything from this post….let it be that you don’t say “No” when a hot sweet man asks to see you!  GO!  Don’t worry about being tired for work! Don’t worry about playing hard to get….it all means nothing!!!  Live in the moment….I didn’t and it sucks!

So he’s back on the ship.  He misses me, I miss him and yet we only met for 4 hours.

We have been emailing each other when the ship is out to sea.  We text and talk on the phone when he has service which is only every Saturday and every other Tuesday…

The 1^st week he was gone he called me from one of the islands and asked if I would consider coming down for a cruise.  Ummmm….hell yeah!!!  My family doesn’t want me to go. They think I’ll be sold into sex slavery (I keep telling them I’m too old and not nearly hot enough for them to be worried about that!!!).

I’m hoping to go on a cruise in January…I’m waiting for more details and praying he doesn’t forget about me or lose interest before then…..

I could use a vacation as well as a week away with a hot, sweet guy who thinks I’m beautiful.

I’ll keep you posted!!!